Actually, we’re not in Las Cruces yet, but we’ve been dying to use that line.
We were supposed to be in Las Cruces tonight, but about 30 miles short of town the unstoppable force of our bikes hit an immovable object of headwind and, two miles of “It’s a twister, Auntie Em!” later, the headwind won. A teeny, tiny Baptist Church sits just off Exit 102 of the I-10 Interstate in New Mexico, and we have claimed sanctuary behind the back wall, perilously close to a cactus with pleasing, palm-like fronds that make you scream “Jesus!!” every time you brush by, cuz those freakin’ fronds are lined with ten million little razor blades, making an unusually strong case for Intelligent Design.
The last few mornings Seb has woken up with a face that looks like a smiling Anime figure, all creases and lines, eyes hidden in a swollen, allergic face. Our field diagnosis is “Gradual Onset of Down Leaking Externally from Sleeping Sack”. GODLESS-ness is a real concern for some of us in the South, and we’ve taken synthetic steps to halt the slide, thanks to the cheapest sleeping bag in the world purchased at Walmart today. Seb will sleep tonight in the arms of the Baptists and the Polyesters, and emerge tomorrow morning, we hope, with two evident eye sockets.
12 Hours Later…
It’s 6:30 in the morning. The Baptist God is shedding tears on the unbelievers. I’m poking the laptop with my tongue cuz my hands have frozen solid to the metal beneath the keyboard. One false poke and my tongue will join my hands. Only then will I be saved.
Seb is deeply immersed – well, as deeply immersed as you can get when wearing Saran Wrap - in his 50-cent Walmart sleeping bag. The fact that he’s draped every spare piece of clothing over himself suggests I should have opted for the higher R-value of the 79-cent model. Another life lesson.
The cold, drizzle, and continued headwind have a curiously sapping effect on motivation and active intentions. I’m probably the only person who has ever felt that way. But, just to show you I can act like everybody else whenever I want to, I’m going to emerge from the Blue Hole of Barcutta and do useful things, things that could be of great benefit to me, you, and Him against who’s House we are camped. Onward Ho…